If you are a parent, you might find validation in a recent US court ruling that held Meta and Google accountable for building addictive social media platforms that harmed a young woman’s mental health. The young woman, named Kelly, was represented by lawyers who argued that features like Instagram’s never-ending ‘infinite scroll’ are intentionally addictive. The court’s decision has been hailed as a ‘defining moment’ for social media companies. However, for parents trying to reduce the amount of screen time their young children spend, this ruling holds limited practical value. We consulted several child-rearing experts to gather their advice on how to help children spend less time on phones, even if only for a short while.
1. Start Early and Be Realistic. Many parents have already given their children tablets or smartphones, so thoughtful consideration before introducing these devices is crucial. Child psychologist Dr. Jane Gilmer emphasizes that completely banning phone use is often not the right choice. She explains, “Changing habits is never easy.” She advises that changes should be introduced calmly and objectively rather than during arguments over screen time. “A calm mindset facilitates effective communication.” As a first step, designating a specific place in the home for storing devices, such as a particular drawer, can be beneficial. “Assign a specific spot for chargers where the phone can be placed to charge when turned off, and that’s where the matter ends.”
2. Collaborate. Child psychologist Dr. Marihan Baker believes that instead of imposing strict rules, older children and teenagers should be involved in discussions about screen time. She says, “I understand this space is important for connecting with your friends. I recognize the social pressure that comes with not using it. Therefore, it’s important we discuss how to balance your time and ours, which will help you stay away from the phone when needed.” Parenting coach Olivia Edwards adds that building a strong relationship with the child or adolescent is essential to successfully reduce screen time.
3. Use Screen Time as a Learning Opportunity. Many parents struggle to understand the trends and features of social media, but this can create opportunities for open discussions about screen time between adults and children. Olivia suggests, “You can ask, ‘Do you know how social media works? Apps are designed to attract people. They earn money based on the time people spend watching – did you know that?'” Dr. Jane points out that this approach helps parents teach children digital literacy.
4. Model Good Behavior. It’s clear that children imitate their parents, so reflecting on your own screen habits is crucial to establishing healthy practices. Marihan recommends approaching this in a light and fun way: “We can say to our children with self-awareness, ‘We all are guilty of this, and our relationship with phones needs improvement. I haven’t been the best at it either.’”
5. Don’t Panic. Raising children has never been easy, and today’s screen era adds complexities we must understand, including concerns. Dr. Tony Sampson, a digital communication expert at the University of Essex, advises parents not to fall into excessive fear. “Parents often become petrified by communication fears and assume every adolescent’s brain is wired to be addicted to social media,” he says. However, children and teenagers have a brain capability called ‘neuroplasticity,’ which allows them to adapt to and recover from their circumstances.
“Social media doesn’t disrupt attention; it captures it, directing it toward commercial content,” he adds. “Positive use of technology can enhance neuroplasticity, fostering creativity, exploration, and learning.”
